Why I Get Nothing Done At Night

We have a very long bedtime routine. Even now that the kids are big enough to do most of their washing and changing themselves, I still take hours at night getting them to sleep. The reason for this madness? I really enjoy reading to them. Ever since my oldest moved to her big girl bed we have read bedtime stories faithfully. It used to be a short and sweet thing to do each night, but now it can take hours, and even then it doesn't take much to persuade me to keep reading a little bit more than I am supposed to.

First off, all three of my kids enjoy different types of books. My four-year-old goes back and forth between picture books and beginner chapter books. We begin with her book each night because she is youngest and tends to fall asleep quickest. Her favorites include a set of beginning phonics books and Junie B. Jones, but our current book is 101 Dalmatians (Puffin story books)by Dodie Smith. The older two are happy about this are enjoying the book as much as she is. This is the book the Disney movie was based on. As usual, the book is much, much better. 

My eight-year-old is enjoying Gregor The Overlander (Underland Chronicles, Book 1)by Suzanne Collins about a boy who falls to an underground world inhabited by giant bugs, bats, and a strange race of humans. Apparently we have a subterranean thing going with him. We had just read a very good abridged version of Journey to the Center of the Earth by Jules Verne after seeing the movie Journey 2. 

My eleven-year-old still loves a bedtime book too even though she reads for pleasure on her own now. I try to pick books she wouldn't pick on her own or something from the classics . Right now she is listening to the first of John Grisham's new book series for kids  Theodore Boone: Kid Lawyer. So far we both like it a lot even though she was not certain a murder mystery legal drama would suit her.  It is a genre of books that is underrepresented in children's books in my opinion. It walks the reader through the legal system in such a way that is both thorough and interesting. She knows very little about the legal system and will occasionally stop me to ask a question. The murder in the story is a strangulation but it is about as non-violent as a murder can be. Before this selection we had read a lot of fantasy and we were both ready for a change of pace. 

So, at any given time I can have three children's chapter books going, my own book club's book, an audio book for the car, and a couple of non-fiction books on whatever subject I am interested in at that moment. Then of course, the kids have their own books they are reading on their own. It is a lot of reading, I guess, but I love it. Thank goodness for good libraries!

I am always on the prowl for the next good book we will read. I am constantly jotting down my friends' ideas. Their writing curriculum by Susan Wise Bauer spends each week on a different book and if the selections strike our fancy, I add it to my future reads list. Despite this, I am down to just a couple of suggestions at the moment, so I would love it if you'd share any of your great suggestions! 

Screen Time

Recently, we've been fighting a nasty cold virus so our routine is off. As my kids draped themselves over couches and complained of boredom, they began to ask for movies or video games to help pass the time. I tend to cave easily to sick, pleading, stuffy-nosed, little voices. Unfortunately, increasing their screen time has never been a good idea no matter what the circumstances. After a couple of days of relaxing our no screen-time until 4:00pm rule, the bickering started. Arguments of what to watch, leads to general crankiness over anything. Soon I was getting nothing but whine. They wanted to do nothing but watch shows and play video games. The problem is that even though they are getting better, their taste for video games and movies has only increased. After a really bad day of tantrums we've decided to ban all leisure screen time for one month. They can have an occasional nature or history documentary and can use the computer for education and research, but no more shows, movies, or video games. Yes, mom and dad are doing this too. I've already been busted too. I was just checking my messages on Facebook when I saw a video my friend had posted. I clicked. I laughed. I got busted by my son. He is still gloating. I have no idea if we will really make it an entire month, but cutting back will definitely be a good thing for us all.

How do you do screen time in your home? How do your kids change after too much screen time?

Winding Down

This is my favorite week of the year. I love the week after Christmas because no one expects you to do anything. Everyone is on vacation. Music lessons? Nope. Sunday school? Holiday break. Sports? See you next year! Regularly scheduled play dates? Out of town. At our home we have been playing video games, catching up on school work, building with Legos, and leisure reading. I am slowly returning to a much less harried version of myself. Things had gotten out of hand around here since October and I am very serious about creating the changes necessary to regain a bit of peace. I've started following Flylady again and have already started getting results. Her organization system is designed for people like me. I'm easily sidetracked and not a "born organized" type. In addition to this system, I have made a hard rule for me and the kids.

Absolutely no more regularly scheduled events of any kind 

are being considered until further notice.

I don't care if the event is only for a few weeks. Anything more is just too much. You see, I love my family and I would like to enjoy life with them. Running at the pace I previously set was wearing me out. As a result, I was starting to spread the frustration to my husband, kids, and most likely my friends. So, I now lace up my shoes, de-clutter my home, and reclaim my home and life. It's only been a few days but the kids have noticed it both in the house and in me.

Getting Our Goove

This year has not been easy. About a week into school this year I was really beginning to question my ability to handle a second grader, a fourth grader and a soon to be three-year-old preschooler. My days were erratic and my kids were resistant. A good friend of mine who unschools her children told me

Reconnect with the kids.

They have to trust you. 

 

At that particular time I didn't even trust myself. I was yelling a lot and there were lots of tears going around. I decided to put the books away for a day and have a game day. We pulled out game after game, sorted the pieces, relearned rules, and had a real good day. I proclaimed the day a success, felt quite proud of my brilliance, and went right back to my old ways. Needless to say, things only got worse. Two days later, I am at my wits end. My husband, who never interferes with my method of teaching told me to take a week off. Two things caused me to agree to this even though it went against my nature.

1. He NEVER interferes with my teaching! 

(Have I said this before? Well, it's true!)  

2. He's usually right. 

(Yes. I put it in print. He'll never let me live it down!) 

So, did it work? Yes. The kids had a great week of doing absolutely nothing. Somewhere in my deluded mind, I envisioned them coming to me with books saying things like "Mother, I'm bored. May I please do some math?" or "It's so much better having something to do. Could you please start school again?" But no. Shockingly, they were content with their Legos and video games. This would never do. They were happy but I was a nervous wreck! How would I ever teach them all that they need? Am I a failure at homeschool? What now? Again, my husband came through. These are the suggestions he made that saved me:

1. Book work only until lunch. 

The kids are so much more productive when the end is in sight. Today, my son woke at 6:00am and decided to get started. He flew through his books and completed three subjects before his school buddies could even get inside the building! Also, I no longer feel stressed about getting in just a bit more after lunch. There is always tomorrow!

2. No TV or other screen time for any of us until after 4:00pm

This is tough. I hadn't realized how much television I was allowing the preschooler to watch. I always tried to give her something educational while I focused on the other two. Unfortunately, she was feeling left out. Now I start with her. I make sure she has something fun before I do anything else. She feels much more included and I feel relieved that she's getting the attention she deserves too. 

The other person who was getting too much screen time was me. Guilty. The computer was eating hours of my time that is better spent elsewhere. Now, I am stopping less frequently and still getting things done.

3. After lunch is project time.

My oldest is involved in several projects and feels the pressure to maintain them. By setting aside these hours for her violin practice, calligraphy, sewing, and various other interests she is more relaxed, getting more done and enjoying things much more. My son uses this time for Lego projects and drawing or outside play. He never tires of any of these.

These simple guidelines have really helped us out. As long as I keep focused on them and don't slip into an overdrive again. I think this year is going to be just fine.