Focusing

I often think that a child's attention is a lot like an unruly puppy that needs to be trained. The puppy wants to play and run wild, but in order to enjoy the puppy to the fullest, you just have to have some training. Given something unpleasant to do like memorize multiplication tables, or do a lesson before an afternoon of fun, my kids minds will do just about anything to keep from doing the work. This really upsets them and often they get frustrated and think they are not capable of the work rather than just having difficulty dealing with their unruly mental puppies.

If there are ways to do the lesson in a fun way, by all means do that! Yet, sometimes you just have to get through an undesirable chore, lesson, or other event. At those times, it is good to be able to focus and get through it. I call this puppy training. They have to train their pups no matter what kind of tricks they pull, and believe me, they can be very cunning.

Tricks their puppies use:

• Distraction: Their minds jump subjects or their bodies feel twitchy. Sometimes they think of a million things they need to be doing right then.
• Pity: I think of this as that sad puppy dog face. Why are you doing this to me? What did I do bad?
• Anger: If they fall for the pup's tricks, they get mad at themselves and then they really can't think. It's just another puppy trick! When they are mad, the work is avoided. 
• Resistance: Sometimes all the pulling in the world won't make a stubborn puppy cooperate. Best to use a treat. Make a promise of a reward if the pup will get let them get their work done.

The kids like thinking of this side of themselves as a trainable puppy. They would never be angry with a puppy for just being a puppy, but they also know they have to figure out the best way to get the puppy to behave so that they can get the results they want. Keeping this degree of separation allows them to not take it so personally and to treat themselves a little nicer, like the sweet pups they really are. 

What If They Change Their Minds?

Photo: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

If I am completely honest, I have to admit I avoid the road that takes me past their old school if possible. When we do have to go by, it never fails that one of the kids will comment about their old school. Their comments are filled with nostalgia. I can't help but ask them about it.

Do you miss it? Do you want to go back?

I fear the answer will be yes. I worry they will want to go back to school because it matters to me what they want. So far, every time I pose the question, the answer has been no.

No way! Nope. Are you kidding? 

And I feel relief and vindication at getting that answer. The thoughts fill my head...  

See! This is better! They LOVE it! 

But what if they didn't? What if the answers start to come back with less certainty? What if they said...

Maybe. I don't know. It might be nice. 

What would I do then? Would that change anything? Would their wanting to go to school outweigh the benefits of homeschool?

No! Not yet! Maybe later. 

Homeschooling is full of moments where doubt creeps in, but there is no reason to borrow trouble. Homeschooling has been the right choice for us and I do not think that will change any time soon. I have to remind myself that I will handle the future when it gets here. If the circumstances change, if my children change their mind, or it no longer seems the best for any other reason, I will consider those new developments at that time. For now, homeschooling is exactly right for us as a unit and for each individual as well. 

And really, that is all I need to know to continue on. 

Grammar: The Nuts and Bolts of Language

Grammar for the Logic Stage

picture: Milestone Ministries

The grammar text we have chosen for the logic stage is Rod and Staff's Building Christian English Series. It has a very strong academic core and no frills. The lessons are explained well in the reading section and are simple but effective in cementing the ideas. The teacher's manual begins with tips for explaining the lesson and follows with  the answers to the problems. I find that the lessons are so well written that it is rare for me to have to use the teacher's manuel, but I am glad I have it. I have looked at several other systems but I haven't found anything that works better for our family.

Rod and Staff is written from a protestant, mennonite, perspective. The illustrations are of mennonite families and many of their lessons have selections from the Bible. This doesn't concern me in the least. I am not a protestant mennonite, but I couldn't care less if the example they use to teach my child about appositive adjectives comes from the gospels or from Harry Potter. I want well written examples and, yes, the Bible is a fantastic source for that. As many who have read my blog know, I consider myself a secular homeschooler because I place academics at the core of our education. When I look for resources I look first to their accuracy and second to their compatibility with my kids learning methods. That is about it. As long as they are reasonably priced, the viewpoint, be it secular or christian, is not a concern as long as it doesn't attempt to preach. When I teach my children about religion, I'll use my own religious resources.

My daughter, on the other hand, is bothered by this perspective. Every time she gets a lesson that is heavily biblical, I hear the sighs and grumbling start. It is distracting to her. She is very sensitive to having people try to persuade her to think or believe differently than she does. My grandmother would say she has a chip on her shoulder when it comes to religion. My mother would say she takes after me. I'd say they both have a point. So, I made a deal with her: if you can find another program or book that teaches grammar as effectively, I would consider it.

Oh, how she wished for another level from the books we used before, but no such luck. Even if new books from the authors of First Language Lessons were being written, they would not be ready for her in time. We looked at three different texts and two different co-ops before she agreed that the Rod and Staff books are either better or allow her more independent study, both of which are important to her.

So, there you have it! Even my daughter, who can smell a religious hard sell a mile away, chose these books for their quality. Once the decision was ours and not just mine, her grumbling stopped too.

History: Our Favorite Story

Andrew Jackson

I've often said that history is one of the main reasons I am homeschooling. With each passing year I become even more convinced that the history we study here surpasses the history I studied in school. My personal experience with the subject consisted of fragmented American history with a concentration on the state I lived in and the famous people who also called it home. Being from Tennessee, I knew the three presidents from here (Jackson, Johnson, and Polk) and the state bird (mockingbird) but I really had no concept of how fascinating world history really is. 

The first time I encountered history outside of this fragmented approach was my first semester of college. I took a Western Civ course taught by a gifted storyteller. She would lean against the front of her desk with arms folded and a binder of notes she would occasionally check for accuracy. She told stories of Europe that I had never heard before. My ignorance appalled me but I wasn't worried about that for long. For the first time in a very long time I was genuinely curious about something! I never missed a class. I would take a legal pad in and begin to write. An hour and twenty minutes later I would leave with pages of notes that I couldn't recall writing and a head full of history. 

Yesterday we completed our history book for the year. This is the third year we've used Story of the World by Susan Wise Bauer. I really enjoy this series and will be using book four next year. The selections read like a bedtime story. I see my children listening to these stories with the same interest I had in my Western Civ class. My children particularly loved history this year because the third book, which ends at 1850, is starting to form the globe into a world they recognize. They saw the United States gain its familiar contiguous shape through the war with Mexico. My son threw up his hands in disgust when the all too familiar story of a power hungry ruler who treated his subjects poorly began to unfold yet again. He wondered aloud why these people didn't see what was coming as clearly as he does. I just smile. My kids have no idea how happy it makes me to see them so interested and passionate about history.

Where Will All of This Homeschooling Lead?

As we wind up another year of homeschooling, I have been looking at our long term goals. For me, homeschooling isn't just about the reading and math skills. It isn't just about getting them into college or a career either. Those are just part of the bigger picture: independence.  It is about having them become self-respecting, self-sufficient, and hopefully happy adults.

It Started with a Stick...

My kids had a stick. 

They turned the stick into a sword, a staff, a magic wand. It was no longer a stick, it was a toy. 

They wanted to make sure this particular toy was never mistaken for a stick. They realized that the adults of the house, may not recognize this toy because it still looked so much like a stick. 

They decided to mark it. They started to write on it, but markers on rough bark was not noticeable enough. They decided to remove the bark. They soon found peeling bark off of a stick (oops, I mean toy) was fun! Now they had a smooth toy that was very different than the other sticks. 

Up for Some Competition

One of the reasons I love homeschooling is the lack of daily competition children find at school. There is no competing to be the quickest to answer, the first in line, or the one who gets to sit at the coolest seat during lunch. However, competition in general isn't something I am against. In fact, when done well, competition can motivate a child to push their boundaries to new heights.

If your child wants a challenge or would like to try for awards, here are just a few of the competitions available for kids going on right now.*

Confetti Jars

At the end of each year, I take an empty jar for each kid and a stack of construction paper. I cut small strips of paper and fold them so they don't stick together. Each subject gets a color and each remaining lesson gets a strip. Subject by subject, strip by strip, the jars begin to fill. I give the jars a good shake and set their confetti jars on the shelf. After each completed lesson, they get to remove a strip of paper and throw it away. It's sort of a variation on the paper chains we use to count down to Christmas. 

This time of year, friends are winding down at their schools and the pools are all gearing up for summer. These jars provide a little boost to help them stay focused on their goals.

Tips for Occupying a Little Sibling

One thing about homeschooling in our house: 

If the YOUNGEST isn't BUSY,

NOBODY is WORKING. 

Keeping the homeschooling humming is not too hard as long as I don't forget to keep the 4yo from being bored. Here are a few of my tricks:

Finding Like Minds

Striking out on my own to homeschool my children was a bit scary. I only knew of a few people who were doing this and I wasn't certain that their reasons were my reasons. Three years later, I am still searching for more like-minded people in the homeschooling community. 

I am a secular homeschooler, but I am not a secular person.

I educate at home in order to provide my children with a solid classical education. 

I use curriculum, but I cater to my children's learning styles and interests. 

I am a middle-of-the-road type of homeschooling mom. 

Let me tell you, it's lonely and a bit scary in the middle of the road. 

Curriculum Review: All About Spelling

Spelling has always been a struggle for me. My 11yo daughter avoids writing because she is restricted by her poor spelling. My 8yo son hates writing and prefers to only do copy work. My 4yo daughter wants to learn to read and do schoolwork. Imagine my delight to find a system that helps us all. Yes, it even helps me. All About Learning Press has a system called All About Spelling that has already produced great results in just a few weeks.

Thinking Outside the Library Aisle

The library is my number one tool for homeschooling. My kids know the children's section at our local branch like the back of their hand. It has become automatic to walk into the library and head to our favorite sections in the children's section. But, as so often happens in life when things become routine, we came across a problem that resulted in a new way of doing things.

The problem? My son got bored.

He'd read about animals, robots and knights. Then he read about mars, dinosaurs, and volcanoes. Then he read about more animals, more robots and more knights. Then he became bored. the problem was that he'd already looked through most of the books on the subjects he was truly interested in and he wanted more.  It got to the point that he no longer wanted to go to the library. He stopped asking for books because he didn't see anything new.

The solution? The adult nonfiction area.

I decided to take him to "my area" and let him see if there was anything he liked. We walked a few feet and he stooped to check out some books that I don't often pay much attention: the huge coffee table books on the bottom shelf that are to big to shelve with the regular books. Most of these books are beautiful and full of pictures and information about a particular subject. He chose a book full of real pictures from Mars. The next weeks brought books of shells, windmills, and bird eggs. We have to be very careful with the giant books because I fear the day I have to replace one of these works of art, but the way they have re-sparked my son's interest in books is worth it!

Me Too!

Last but not least, I am going to talk about what it takes to school a preschooler. Preschool is a silly word for a homeschooling family, but I use it because everyone knows what I mean. My soon to be 4yo is not one to sit quietly on the sidelines while her older siblings have all of mommy's attention. She Loves to be in the thick of things. When we do book work, I make sure she has her own stack of activity and coloring books. When she sits down I make sure I assign her a page and give her complete instructions even if it is, "You should color these however you want." I make sure to read books with her often and have a set of BOB books she is working with on sounding out words. It doesn't take long. Once she realizes I am not ignoring her she is usually content to go get a toy to play with. Sculpting clay or paint is another favorite for her. The most important thing for me is to NOT resort to screen time if I can help it. A house rule is that screens (unless used for learning) stay off until 4:00pm daily. Everyone here is at some level of learning (even mom and dad!) and meeting those needs daily is what homeschooling is all about.

Making a List and Checking it Off!

Yesterday, I wrote about what it takes to school my oldest.  Today, I am going to focus on my son. My middle child is my only boy and my only type A. He wants to know what he has to do ahead of time so he can get it done and get on with life. I really think I could give him a list a mile long and he'd shrug his shoulders and start at number one. He plugs along until he's done and then sit by his Lego pile to play.

His struggles are of a different sort. He needs a quiet atmosphere to think and focus. It's lucky that he has his own room with a desk so he can retreat whenever things get too chaotic. He's an introvert in the Meyers-Briggs kind of way. He loves to get together with his friends, but NEEDS quiet time to recharge. When his brain can't engage, we just have to take a minute (or thirty) until he can focus. All the pushing and insisting will only frustrate him.  My son went to public kindergarten and did quite well. His only complaint was a "bully" and the noise. (I must say the little girl he deemed a bully was terribly annoying and not at all nice, but I don't think she was a bully.) He is absolute in his love of homeschooling and never wants to go back.  The hardest part of his school day is getting away from his sisters and getting me all to himself for one-on-one lessons. 

I sometimes worry about getting my little introvert out more and making sure he has time with other boys his own age. I worry that I don't have him involved in enough outside activities. I shouldn't worry though. He doesn't want to be involved in formal groups; he likes field trips in small groups. When we do go places, he's well behaved and polite, and he's never had a problem making friends.

End Points

Things have been hopping here!  We've started the year out and are trying to find our groove. One of the problems I have is trying to school three different ages at once. My biggest struggle is my oldest. Not because she is any more difficult than the others, it is because I am new to parenting this age and have to start finding out what works from scratch. I have a soon to be 11yo who is blossoming into a new stage of life that is filled with push/pull moments. She wants more independence and responsibility yet feels affronted at the work that often accompanies this. She is entering the logic stage of the classical method. She is excited to be switching gears, but feels paralyzed at what appears to be loads of more work. I am frustrated by the fact that the only thing that is holding her back is her fear of the volume of work. When she really tries and doesn't panic, she had no difficulty and completes everything quickly. After a month of this struggle, I saw progress in her education but a substantial drop in her joy of learning. So, for September we have decided to change our approach. We've divided her subjects into timed segments. She has to work steadily for the set time and may stop as soon as her time is up. The results: She is working for far less time and completing at least twice the amount as before. What this shows me is that a defined end point is vital to her being able to focus. If she feels that she has a never ending hill to climb, she can't even begin. She's happy for the moment and is a huge relief to me. More on the other two kids' stages in the days ahead.

Homeschool Lite

SUMMER! POOLS! BOOKS! COOK OUTS! 


Books?!?! 

Summer is here and so many friends and family are asking me if we are through with the school year. The answer is YES! and No. We've completed our number of school days with lots of room to spare. The grades are submitted and technically we are done. The problem is that we still haven't completed everything that we set out to do this year. Call me an overachiever. We could just move on next fall, after all, there is no rush to finish, but then, there is no reason to just laze the summer away either. My solution is homeschool lite! Each day my kids have a couple of lessons to do before the regular summer fun starts. We steadily chip away at the remainder of their books until they are ready to begin their new ones in the fall. I am considering letting them start their new curriculum early when the other books are done. My daughter's idea of F.U.N. is anything new. She looks to those shiny new books with eagerness. My son isn't concerned with the new books; he is all too aware of the work packed between their covers. He does like the idea of getting a head start on next year though.

This summer is already packed with great music performances, summer camps (a first for us), outdoor grilling, and lots and lots of pool time! A couple of lessons a day will hardly be noticed. Oh, sure, there is grumbling some days, a beach bag with towels by the door can be distracting! But, when they realize that the pool isn't even open yet and they can't go until the lesson is done, it is amazing how focused they become on completing their work.

Outsourcing

I know my limits. I am not an art teacher.

I am creative, artistic, and resourceful, 

but I am not good at teaching art. 

Thankfully, Juli is. I found these classes at ARTLIFE at the beginning of the semester and I enrolled my seven-year-old son and my ten-year-old daughter. It was money well spent. They discussed line, shade, variety, texture, balance, harmony, and color. They worked with lithography, clay, paint, and paper. I got lots of ideas about what worked for them and what didn't. Now I know when stocking up on supplies, paint and clay are at the top of the list while I can save money on other items that are only mildly interesting to my kids. 

Nor am I a physical education teacher. 

I enjoy walking, swimming, and going to the parks,

but know nothing about introducing my kids to sports. 

Thankfully, Jennifer and Tiffany do. I happened on the Road Runners, a kids marathon and triathlon training running club for homeschoolers, this spring also. Neither of my kids were getting enough exercise and I did not know where to begin with helping keep fit. This club offered goal setting, instruction on correct form, and tons of encouragement. Even though neither of my kids are going to do the triathlon this year, my kids have gained strength and endurance since they began. Because it is for homeschoolers, they expect the toddlers, mommies, and kids of all ages. My three-year-old daughter runs along or gets some piggy-back rides. Now that they are focusing on bike riding, she hops on her tricycle and zooms along.

After these great experiences, I will never hesitate to call upon others to help my children when I don't feel quite up to the task.

Homeschool Advantages: Freedom of Time

It isn't the reason I decided to homeschool, but I love to be master of my own time. I still get the same 24 hours as everyone else, but by homeschooling, I can rearrange our time as our life demands. For homeschoolers, the daily tempo is set by each member of the family rather than the rigid schedule put forth by the teacher. Here, if the three year old is feeling out of sorts, we adjust to meet her needs. She may only need a lap and a story but that may require us all to shift things a bit. Projects may be placed on hold while I tend to an unexpected crisis. The key to making this work is to rearrange the things I need to get done and not to put them off indefinitely.

The Dark Days of History

A doctor's clothing

I knew it was coming. It was inevitable. The dark stuff of history had to be discussed at some point. As we worked chronologically we had already seen some things that were bad: wars, religious intolerance, and even some rulers that were just plain mean. Yet, I knew the bubonic plague would be different. We use The The Story of the World: History for the Classical Child: The Middle Ages  by Susan Bauer and I think it did a very good job at introducing this topic with enough seriousness so they can feel the reality of it while minimizing the gruesomeness. The stories of entire towns being lost and people dying in a matter of a day or two, stunned my wide-eyed, vaccinated innocents.

It wasn't long before my kids began to put some facts together. Call it bad timing, but the pets were due their flea and tick medicine about that time and my kids saw me giving them their doses. That night, my oldest asked me if she could get the plague from the cats who tend to sleep in her bed.

The Math We Love

This was the very first curriculum we looked into as beginning homeschoolers. It was my husband's recommendation. My husband's picks should always be taken seriously. He will research something to death, logically compile the information, and then say "I like XYZ. What do you think?" I've learned over the years, what on the surface appears to be an off-handed remark, is actually the result of a lot of thought. And, again, he was spot on. (Yes, it's here in print for the whole world to see! I will never live it down!)